It’s Time to Prioritize Your Evolution

Welcome to Evolving With Elle, where a capable woman recognizes what she's managing,

understands the responsibilities that she's carrying, and chooses self-honoring over

self-abandonment, and decides to continue, change, or release. I am Elle. I bring the mirror,

the map, and the method. You choose how you show up in a way that honors your capacity.

So let's lean in, learn, and evolve together. All right, ladies, let's just be real.

As I am sharing with you, I'm going to invite you into my world. When I stepped into this space

and I was investing in myself with other people, I'm like, oh, you guys are just using

pretty language to help entice me and manipulate me, right?

Well, some of that could have been true. I don't know. Let me tell you, that's not what I'm doing.

What I am doing is I'm going to share with you what happened for me.

In my life, I told you there were a lot of things that came all at once. It was heavy at way

beginning. I didn't know which way to turn, what to do. And I was, I expected that since I was a

woman, that people needed to just help me because I've been helping everybody else using my energy

to pour into other people and no one was pouring into me. And I'm like, y'all don't ask me to pay

one red cent. You better give me something because I've been investing my time, my energy,

and my money in other places. I don't have it to invest in myself.

And then they were very kind and said, oh, that's so sweet. No, I'm not going to give you anything

for free because I had to work to get here. So yeah, there's some things that you can have

complimentary, but it's not going to get you where you want. It's not going to get you out

of the pain that you're feeling and that you're in right now. I was like, those, that's not nice.

That's mean. And as I told you, I had to look at myself in the mirror and say, if the shoe was on

the other foot, would I want to give away what's valuable for me? What took me energy, time,

and money to create? Do I want to just give that away for free? No. So these mean people,

as I called them initially, told me to figure it out. That if I was in enough pain, I would figure

it out. And I did. I figured it out because the pain that I was in was too much. It cost me energy.

It cost me my health. And that's still money. I had to spend money for my health. It cost me time.

So those three things that we always say, I don't have enough time. I don't have enough money.

I don't have enough energy. I said the same things. And then I said, it's costing me

to stay in this pain. It's costing me to, how does that saying go? Something about staying

with the devil that you know? That didn't make any, we say crap like that. And then when you sit

down and you reflect on it and you say, stay with the devil I know. Huh. That means I'm subjecting

myself to abuse, to something that's evil, something that does not align with me to do that

rather than figure out a way to invest in myself. So I say reject the devil that you know.

And understand the cost. What is it costing you? As I shared, it cost me my health.

I had to have a medical procedure because I was stressed out and it stayed in my body. And my

was like, we don't know what to do with all this energy. So let's let this thing go left. Sorry,

left. Your left, not mine. Apologies. Ah, it went left. Okay. Then

relationships. It cost me relationships. I thought that I was doing the best that I knew how to do for

my children because my mother had passed away. And then years later, my dad passed away and I

realized, Oh, I'm not going to be here forever. So let me pour everything I can into my children.

Blinders on, focus. This is the way it's going to go. This is the way it needs to be.

But I wasn't considering my children. What did they need? How did they need it? Said to them.

And because I didn't consider them, they were like, Hey mommy, you and dad are divorced.

We got a choice. And they made a choice. It cost me relationship.

And then, you know, that, that nine to five thing that helps us have that money.

It cost me there too. I couldn't focus because my mind was on my children. My mind was on my body.

My mind was on parents that passed away. My mind was on, Oh, what are people going to think about

me? That's a cost. That's a cost of energy time because the time to be in my head, rather than

being in relationship with my children or fully expressing the grief that was in my body so that

my body didn't betray itself anymore. So the money's going to go somewhere. So why not allow

the money, your time and your energy to go towards you. Allow it to go towards you. Because as I hold

up this mirror, give you a map and a method, you are the one who gets to choose the manner in which

you receive and put into action in a way that supports you. You need to get your needs met.

So I want to be clear about something. Yes, I do have something to offer you. But guess what? I'm

not the only one. And I know I'm not the only one that can support you and partner with you. So you

get to invest with yourself with someone who will help you get your needs fulfilled.

Okay? Investment in yourself is necessary. And as capable women, we invest in ourselves all the time.

We've got degrees that we're still paying student debt on, for crying out loud. We go get

certifications for our jobs, continuing education to keep our licenses. So we are accustomed to

investing in ourselves. And that is what I am offering and asking and shifting, offering you a

perspective. That's what this is about. And yes, I am so passionate that I'm an extremely passionate

person. I hope you know that. I'm extremely passionate about you honoring you and providing

an opportunity. And I know there are other women like me who want to provide you opportunities.

So as you are listening to this podcast, I hope that something lands in your heart

to where you're just like, huh, I didn't see that in myself before.

I didn't know that I could take that direction. I'm glad I've got this map.

Oh my goodness. I didn't know that that was a good method to use.

Let me figure out what I can take from what Elle is helping me evolve into.

Yes, you get to evolve. You are a capable woman. You have a lot that's in front of you.

Continue to invest in you. It's not selfish. It's not, oh no, this is you loving on you.

It's you loving on you. And if anyone out there tries to say, oh, you're changing, you're different.

And you go ahead with your head held high and you say, yes, I am. I am changed. I am different.

Thank you for noticing. That's what you get to do. Thank you so much for listening.

Thank you more importantly for investing in yourself. Everyone in your world will see

the choices you are making and they're going to learn from you. You will inspire.

You may even rub people the wrong way, but that means like just erase them out of your life.

Wash that man right out of your hair. Makes me think of that South Pacific. That's one of the

songs that my mother shared with me. Yeah, it's necessary to wash some things away and it's okay.

All right. Let's settle in. Thank you for listening. See you next time.