In this episode of Evolving With Elle, Elle explores what happens when we stop abandoning ourselves and begin making choices that truly honor who we are. Through honest reflections on parenting, co-parenting, career, entrepreneurship, and personal growth, she shares how strengthening the relationship with yourself creates healthier, more authentic relationships with everyone around you.
Elle also reinforces her Expect and See Framework—the Mirror, the Map, and the Method—a practical approach to reflecting on your life, embracing feedback with intention, and choosing a path that aligns with your values. If you've been carrying too much, second-guessing yourself, or feeling overwhelmed by life's many roles, this episode will encourage you to trust the process, take intentional steps forward, and remember that your evolution is ongoing—and you don't have to do it alone.
GIFT LINK AND DESCRIPTION COMING - MAX WILL SEND MONDAY
The Shift Beneath the Words:
- Strong relationships begin with your relationship with yourself
- Personal growth is an ongoing journey, not a destination.
- You always have the power to choose
- Growth often happens through small, intentional steps.
Elle encourages listeners to embrace discomfort and step into the unknown, reminding them that transformation doesn't require giant leaps. Sometimes meaningful change comes through "micro steps" taken consistently while trusting the process and allowing yourself to evolve.
About the Host:
Elle Jaye is a professional woman, speaker, facilitator, entrepreneur, and host of “Evolving with Elle: When Capable Women Carry Too Much”. Drawing from lived transformation, professional leadership, entrepreneurship, and continued study, she partners with capable, heart-centered women who appear successful yet feel overwhelmed, second-guess themselves, or are tired of living by expectations they did not choose. As a Holistic Alignment Strategist, Elle uses honest reflection, elevating conversations, and her mirror, map, and method approach to support women in reclaiming their inner authority, honoring their capacity, and creating lives rooted in their values. She believes evolution is personal, but it does not have to be solitary.
Connect with Elle:
Website: https://mailchi.mp/3ae59b526c7c/ellejaye
Instagram: www.instagram.com/ellejayesllc
Facebook: www.facebook.com/ElleJayesllc
Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@THRIVEAfter
The Evolving With Elle Podcast is proud to be on the Inspired Speaker Network.
⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ Don’t forget to follow, rate & review. It helps us reach more people who want to create positive change in the world, like you.
Check out More Shows from the Network at https://inspiredspeakernetwork.com
Welcome to Evolving With Elle, where a capable woman recognizes what she's managing,
Speaker:understands the responsibilities that she's carrying, and chooses self-honoring over self-abandonment,
Speaker:and decides to continue, change, or release.
Speaker:I am Elle. I bring the mirror, the map, and the message.
Speaker:You choose how you show up in a way that honors your capacity.
Speaker:So let's lean in, learn, and evolve together.
Speaker:I am a woman who has made it through so many things, right?
Speaker:I've been educated. I've had parents pass away. I've had children.
Speaker:Power struggles with them. I've had to deal with a co-parent, right?
Speaker:All of that is challenging.
Speaker:And through all of those various situations, I was talking to myself in particular ways, right?
Speaker:I was like, oh, no, I should do this, or this is what my children need.
Speaker:Oh, I've got to do this for my job.
Speaker:Do you see how many different places my mind is going as this one person with so many roles?
Speaker:Working, being a mother, having to co-parent, creating a business.
Speaker:That's a lot.
Speaker:So in doing all of that, I was speaking to myself in very harsh ways, saying what I should do.
Speaker:Pointing out what I haven't done yet.
Speaker:Thinking I should be further along than what I was.
Speaker:And then came a time where the weight of it all was huge.
Speaker:It was ginormous, right?
Speaker:And what I mean by that is there were big things happening at the same time.
Speaker:And I couldn't keep talking to myself like that.
Speaker:Plus all of this weight on top of me, it was just a recipe to be devastated, broken, just lay down, go to sleep.
Speaker:And not wake up for a long time.
Speaker:Eventually would wake up, but just not for a long time because it was just one sleep through.
Speaker:It's like if I go to sleep, it's just going to go away, right?
Speaker:Nope.
Speaker:So what did I have to do?
Speaker:And yeah, it was a have to.
Speaker:I looked at myself in the mirror.
Speaker:You know, the famous song by Michael Jackson, The Man in the Mirror.
Speaker:And having to make a change.
Speaker:Nope.
Speaker:Don't want to change.
Speaker:But that change is necessary.
Speaker:And in looking at myself in the mirror.
Speaker:I got to be honest with myself.
Speaker:And say.
Speaker:You're being me to yourself.
Speaker:The movies of your mind, the narrative, the story.
Speaker:It's not true.
Speaker:You may believe it is, but it's not true.
Speaker:You have been receiving feedback.
Speaker:Through all of these situations.
Speaker:Is it feedback that you want to hear?
Speaker:No.
Speaker:But is it necessary for you to look at it?
Speaker:And ask yourself.
Speaker:What can I learn from this?
Speaker:So I got curious.
Speaker:I reflected.
Speaker:I got curious.
Speaker:After that.
Speaker:I began to examine.
Speaker:Who I am, how do I show up?
Speaker:Am I connected?
Speaker:Truly and honestly.
Speaker:With what L wants.
Speaker:Or.
Speaker:Was I.
Speaker:Going through motions.
Speaker:Because that's what somebody else told me.
Speaker:But what does L want to do?
Speaker:And I began to say to myself.
Speaker:Hey, you've been shrunk.
Speaker:You are open.
Speaker:You are powerful.
Speaker:You are free.
Speaker:You love connecting with other people.
Speaker:You enjoy.
Speaker:Having compassion.
Speaker:For others.
Speaker:And you, you just have a big heart and you just love.
Speaker:That was hard.
Speaker:To do.
Speaker:To look at myself in the mirror.
Speaker:To reflect.
Speaker:To be honest with who I've been this whole entire time.
Speaker:Because the voice.
Speaker:To stay in the familiar.
Speaker:And.
Speaker:Be loyal to your family who taught you.
Speaker:Those foundational trainings.
Speaker:I felt that if I.
Speaker:Stood and looked at them from a different perspective.
Speaker:That I would be dishonoring.
Speaker:My parents.
Speaker:Disobeying my parents, disobeying God.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:God is a big part of my life.
Speaker:Not trying to change anybody.
Speaker:That is part of.
Speaker:What makes me.
Speaker:So.
Speaker:So.
Speaker:In.
Speaker:Those various relationships.
Speaker:Familial relationships, spiritual relationships.
Speaker:There were particular things I was taught.
Speaker:Traditions.
Speaker:And.
Speaker:Patterns and ways to show up.
Speaker:That once I got connected with L.
Speaker:I got to say.
Speaker:I can.
Speaker:Honor these.
Speaker:And.
Speaker:Take them down to where they lined up with.
Speaker:And did not overpower me.
Speaker:I didn't overpower them.
Speaker:I found what lined up with me.
Speaker:And that.
Speaker:Is how I overcame.
Speaker:The battle that was happening inside my heart and my head.
Speaker:That is how I.
Speaker:Began to shift.
Speaker:Into speaking to myself.
Speaker:From a place.
Speaker:That was loving.
Speaker:Compassionate.
Speaker:Connected.
Speaker:Who I just said I am.
Speaker:I spoke to myself.
Speaker:Based on who I am.
Speaker:I gave it to myself.
Speaker:First.
Speaker:And now.
Speaker:I'm able to give it to others.
Speaker:So freely.
Speaker:Because.
Speaker:I'm free.
Speaker:I'm powerful.
Speaker:And I am.
Speaker:Open.
Speaker:Oh, my goodness.
Speaker:So.
Speaker:You have that same opportunity.
Speaker:That same possibility.
Speaker:It doesn't matter.
Speaker:What.
Speaker:Heavy weights come upon you.
Speaker:You are in there.
Speaker:You get to find those, those heavy weights and you get to bring them.
Speaker:Down to align with who you are.
Speaker:It's okay.
Speaker:You have got this.
Speaker:So that's the mirror.
Speaker:That I stood in.
Speaker:And you get to stand in the mirror too.
Speaker:As we're here, I'm going to hold the mirror up.
Speaker:Look at yourself.
Speaker:Look at your beautiful self.
Speaker:You can do this.
Speaker:That's the mirror.
Speaker:And then the map.
Speaker:The map is.
Speaker:I will share my experiences.
Speaker:Where you can say, oh, I know something similar.
Speaker:I know something similar.
Speaker:From your own.
Speaker:And you get to.
Speaker:We're here. We're on this journey together.
Speaker:And I will offer you.
Speaker:A method.
Speaker:And in that method, you get to make it.
Speaker:Yours.
Speaker:So from the mirror.
Speaker:The map.
Speaker:And the method that I am offering you.
Speaker:You get to honor.
Speaker:How you can make it work for you.
Speaker:How it fits your capacity.
Speaker:As you.
Speaker:Take the mirror, the map.
Speaker:And the method.
Speaker:And make it yours.
Speaker:You may be wondering what's the result.
Speaker:Why, why should I do that?
Speaker:Well, let me tell you.
Speaker:Originally, I thought it was impossible.
Speaker:I thought.
Speaker:That.
Speaker:I was going to disrupt.
Speaker:My life.
Speaker:I was going to disappoint people.
Speaker:I thought.
Speaker:I was going to be shunned.
Speaker:And rejected.
Speaker:No.
Speaker:When I got.
Speaker:Connected.
Speaker:With who I am.
Speaker:It drew.
Speaker:So much to me.
Speaker:That was.
Speaker:Simple.
Speaker:It was, there was so much ease.
Speaker:And flow and I'm like, wait a minute.
Speaker:I thought everything was supposed to be complicated and hard.
Speaker:No.
Speaker:When you begin to choose.
Speaker:What lines up for you.
Speaker:Who you are in your heart.
Speaker:It's like.
Speaker:The heavens open up on earth.
Speaker:And you're just like.
Speaker:Why haven't I done this sooner?
Speaker:You become speechless.
Speaker:And.
Speaker:You're just like, wait, all of these things are possible.
Speaker:And I can make a choice.
Speaker:It may not work out the way I expect.
Speaker:But I can learn from that too.
Speaker:Yes.
Speaker:Because you're choosing.
Speaker:From who you are.
Speaker:Not from this external stuff.
Speaker:You're choosing from inside.
Speaker:And when you choose from the inside.
Speaker:You get to create what you put into this world.
Speaker:And that is the value.
Speaker:Of following.
Speaker:The map.
Speaker:After you've looked in the mirror.
Speaker:And harvesting from the method that I'm sharing with you.
Speaker:So that you can make it yours.
Speaker:Because you're more than capable.
Speaker:You've been capable your whole entire life.
Speaker:But no one told you.
Speaker:I'm going to tell you.